


Nightmares and Retrospections

by MetamorphicRocky



Series: Dadspeed [9]
Category: Final Space (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Dadspeed, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, injuries, okay scratch that it's sad as hell, this is kinda sad, this is pre-finale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-29 15:42:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20799047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MetamorphicRocky/pseuds/MetamorphicRocky
Summary: A nightmare about his possessed father makes Little Cato start to think about how he feels about Avocato's past actions, but luckily Gary is there to help him when it's rough.





	Nightmares and Retrospections

**Author's Note:**

> haha this is sad as shit. I came up with it before the finale and I don't care I wanted to write it anyway. like I really want to know what Little Cato thinks about what his dad was like before the being captured thing
> 
> anyways enjoy pain!!

The dark, looming figure stalks forward, a sinister growl growing louder as he approaches. Little Cato shakes, one arm desperately clutching at Gary. He can't feel a pulse, and he's kneeling in a pool of blood that just continues to expand. The gun trembles in his hand, not being able to tear his eyes away from his dad, his eyes glowing and enraged. 

"Please, don't do this!" Little Cato cries, holding Gary's head closer to his chest. 

His father just snarls, tightening the grip on his gun as he keeps moving. 

Little Cato can feel the tears streaming down his face, and he can't do this. He can't shoot his dad. The blood continues to spread.

"If you're in there, stop this!"

Avocato doesn't stop. "I would _never_ father something so _weak_!"

His chest heaves as the sky darkens, and the ground is just _blood blood blood_ that threatens to swallow him up whole, forcing his legs to be submerged as his father wades through a crimson sea. The warmth of the red brings the striking difference between it and Gary's skin into frightening clarity. 

"Dad, please, come on!" Little Cato sobs, choking on his words as he tries to protect Gary's corpse—because that's what he is now, just a corpse floating in a flood of scarlet—and keep his gun straight. "This isn't you! Fight it!"

Avocato stops, and now he's directly in front of his son, pointing a gun to the boy's forehead. Little Cato is frozen as he stares up at his father, who's eyes are no longer glowing but manage to be filled with even more anger. He blinks, and—

He doesn't see his dad anymore. He sees the Lord Commander's right hand, the uniform fitting his form like he was meant to wear it. The glower on his face is replaced with a cruel smirk, and he shoves the gun up against Little Cato's head as he laughs. 

Little Cato knows that he's going to die right now, and his gun drops from his grip and splashes into the blood beneath him, sinking into unknown depths. The young Ventrexian just holds Gary's head tighter, his body trembling against the dead weight.

"Please," Little Cato pleads, a last attempt to reason with his father. 

His father laughs sinisterly again, and all the noise of the planet around him disappears, plunging them into an icy silence. Avocato tilts his head, and his voice is clear and loud yet quiet and confusing all at once as he says with spite, "Oh, but this _is_ me."

Little Cato's eyes widen as the trigger pulls, the shot ringing out as his body falls into the endless red of Gary's blood.

* * *

Little Cato shoots up in his bed, pushing his hands onto his mouth and forcing it to stay shut to avoid screaming out. His chest is heaving, warm tears spilling down his face. Sobs threaten to break free, so he scrambles down the ladder and out into the hallway before he can wake up Fox. Tears blur his vision as he runs barefooted, somehow managing to end up on the bridge. 

He wipes away the tears on his face as he jumps up into the pilot's seat, landing on a lump of clothing. The boy looks down to see Gary's jacket, and he doesn't hesitate to slip it on as he curls up into a miserable ball. His sobs make him tremble violently, choking on his tears as the nightmare plays over and over again in his head. 

His dad, not possessed by a horrifying evil, but _himself_, shooting him in cold blood and enjoying it. He's absolutely terrified. His hands scramble to wrap themselves around his torso in his sad attempt to calm himself down. 

Little Cato just lays there and sobs, until all of a sudden a hand touches his shoulder. The kid's eyes fly open, and he shoves the hand away immediately and scrambles to find his gun because he knows he has it and he's _in danger and oh god he's going to be killed by his dad and_—

"Woah, woah, Spidercat! Hey, hey, it's okay. It's Gary! It's just Gary, okay, buddy?"

Little Cato stops in his panic and whips his head up to see...Gary. His shoulders deflate in slight relief at seeing the familiar face, but then his eyes drift from Gary's concerned face to his chest. His bare chest, with three circular scars. 

He blinks, and blood pours from two of the now gaping holes in his torso. All of the breath leaves Little Cato's body in a rush, then he screams, loud and raw and terribly frightened.

His hands rush to Gary's chest and start pressing down on one wound but then the other just keeps bleeding and bleeding and oh god he can't breathe but that doesn't matter when Gary is dying and he can't stop it! He's going to _die_ and it'll be his fault and _he can't breathe but the blood, oh the blood, there's so much_—

"No no no no!" Little Cato screams, panting as his throat constricts around a sob as even more wet and hot tears pour from his eyes. His hands are covered in blood, but Gary continues to stand there as he tries to keep him alive. "NO! _COME ON, NO NO NO!_"

All of a sudden, someone seizes his shaking arms and tears the jacket off of him. Little Cato can't resist the action because there's nothing he can do to stop Gary from dying, even though he's trying so hard and why can't he just keep one person alive?!

He collapses on the ground and lays there, screaming and sobbing in his grief because Gary is dead, and it's all his fault, always his fault—

He barely registers a warm hand touching his face until another, one made of metal, gently shakes him, so he opens his eyes to see the figure of Gary moving him up into a sitting position against a seat.

Little Cato shoots up and wipes the tears away as best as he can, and he's met with the sight of Gary, who is very much alive. He's wearing his jacket now, and it's zipped up almost the whole way. 

Little Cato hiccups. "What?" he whispers confusedly.

Gary's frown deepens, and he strokes the kid's head. "You were having a panic attack or something similar, buddy," he starts gently. "You saw my scars and started pressing down on them like you were trying to stop them from bleeding...."

"But you were!" Little Cato shouts.

The man shakes his head. "It was all in your head; those wounds are all healed up now, remember?"

The kid looks down at his hands to see them completely free of any blood, so he turns them over and over again to check. He finds nothing.

"All in my head...," he trails off in a whisper.

He gently pushes Gary's hand away from his face and stands just to sit down in the pilot's seat, pulling his knees to his chest and resting his cheek on his arm. His tears are a more slow trickle now, but he continues to hiccup and sob.

He can hear Gary moving over to sit in front of the seat, but he refuses to look at him again until the image of gunshot wounds recedes from his mind.

"Spidercat?" Gary whispers, and Little Cato can hear how worried he is. The Ventrexian shakes his head, and Gary's approaching hand retreats. "Is it okay if I sit here?" Little Cato quickly glances at him and nods.

They sit there in silence as Little Cato tries to collect himself and remind himself of what's real and what isn't. It is much harder than he wants it to be. 

After maybe minutes or hours, Little Cato finally runs out of the most of his tears. He doesn't think they'll fully stop, but it's manageable for now. He turns his head towards Gary, who's aimlessly staring at his blank phone screen, probably just needing something to distract himself.

Carefully, Little Cato places a hand on Gary's shoulder to gain his attention. The blond sets his phone on the ground and turns around to look at the kid, a tired yet comforting smile on his face.

"Hey, buddy," Gary says, softly carding his hand through the fur of the kid's cheek. Little Cato leans into the touch. "Do you think you could tell me what upset you?"

Little Cato shuffles around to face Gary, and he looks him directly in the eyes as he whispers, "He killed you. Then he killed me."

Gary's eyes widen, his eyebrows scrunching up in confusion and worry. "Avocato?"

Little Cato nods.

Gary swears under his breath. "Damn, no wonder you panicked so badly when you saw me. Was that all there was to the nightmare?"

Little Cato shakes his head, but he stays silent. He doesn't know how to tell Gary what he's feeling. How even after all this time of trying to reason that his father would never do that, he still worries about it anyways.

"Take all the time you need, kiddo."

Oh man. Little Cato starts tearing up again, and he tries to wipe it away. Gary is so nice and caring, and he's so conflicted about everything right now. 

"Do you–do you think...my dad...was a good person?"

Gary's nose scrunches up in confusion over the question. "Where is this coming from?"

"Because when he shot me, he wasn't possessed." Little Cato sobs again. "He was in that damn uniform, and he was happy to do it. I told him to fight it and he just—said that this was him."

"Hey, that was just a nightmare. You know your dad would never—!"

"But he almost did!" Little Cato shouts frantically, finally uncurling from his previous position. "He didn't just refuse to kill me when the Lord Commander first gave the order. He brought me all the way down there to kill me, and he didn't try to stop it until after everyone else's kids were dead."

Gary pauses at that for a moment. "But he didn't kill you, and he spent the next three years searching for you. He died for you," he says emphatically.

"Would you have done it?" Little Cato says quietly. "Would you have even considered it?"

The man stays silent, and Little Cato knows that it isn't because he has to think about the answer—but because Gary knows that the Ventrexian won't like the implications of it. Little Cato sighs as more tears brim his eyes. 

"You knew him better than me, so tell me. And be honest about it, okay?" the kid pleads.

Gary rubs a tired hand across his face. "I only knew him for a few weeks, bud. And I never found out about the whole Lord Commander thing until we went to rescue you."

Little Cato's mouth drops open in shock. "What? But, you were best friends!"

His dad scratches the back of his neck nervously. "Yeah, I kinda just befriended the first person who would talk to me without killing me first. He was still my best friend, but I just don't know much about him before we met. You know him the best, Spidercat."

"I only know the guy who killed over four billion people," Little Cato cries quietly.

The tears start making their way down Little Cato's ridiculously wet face, and his shoulders start to tremble. He watches as Gary stands up from where he's been sitting on the floor, and he's surprised when Gary picks up him out of the seat and hugs him, sitting back down with the kid in his lap. Little Cato hugs back tightly, burying his face into Gary's shoulder. These are the moments when he's hit by how different his two dads are.

Gary rubs a hand up and down his back to comfort him, so Little Cato pipes up, "He never did things like this with me."

"Like what?"

The boy shrugs. "Listen to me talk, or be affectionate all the time like you are. He wasn't around too much."

Gary pulls away from the hug with a frown. "Do you want me to stop doing it? It's okay if you do, I don't want to replace Avocato or—"

Little Cato grabs his dad's hand in shock and shakes his head. "No! Never, I like it a lot. And I'm really glad that you're my dad! I'm just...not used to it."

"Do you wish that Avocato did it more?" Gary asks, scratching the kid's sweet spot behind his ear to comfort him.

Does he wish that his father was there more? Well, yeah. And is he kind of upset about never hearing him say that he loves him when Gary has said it too many times to count? Okay, he's more than sort of upset about that part. 

He nods his head guiltily.

"Hey, that's okay, buddy," Gary soothes. "He wasn't the best father he could've been, and he knows that. You're more than allowed to be upset about it."

Little Cato lifts his head up to look at his dad pleadingly. "Was he a good person, though?"

The blond stares at Little Cato seriously, trying to come up with an answer. He sighs heavily and shrugs. "I don't know. I think he wants to be better though, so it's all up to him. And especially you, okay? How you feel is important, Spidercat."

Little Cato nods, and Gary wipes away some more of the kid's tears and ruffles his hair.

"This sucks," the kid says matter-of-factly.

"Yeah it does. But we'll get through it together. As a team."

"As a squad," Little Cato recites.

They both look at each other with small smiles, and they finish it off unison, "As a team squad."

The Ventrexian laughs quietly and wraps his arms around his dad again, listening to his heartbeat just to reassure himself that he is definitely alive and not bleeding everywhere. He stares out into the deep expanse of space, the stars shining bright all around them. Sometimes, staring at the nothingness terrifies him, reminding him of a time when there was nothing but him, but right now, he might be okay.

"It's pretty," he whispers.

He feels Gary nod. "Yeah. Now try to get some sleep. Nothing'll happen to me."

Little Cato gets comfortable and starts to trace constellations in his head. Of course he's still scared, but they're both alive for now, and they have each other. Maybe, just once, everything might be alright in the end.


End file.
